Mmhh.. Love a good book

This week I have been reading the book "Searching for God knows what" by Donald Miller. And what a fantastic book so far. Donald Miller is by far one of my favorite authors, if not my favorite. He has such a way with words that makes you feel like he is a real person. 


I have read a lot of Christian novels and most of them have some great points but I don't really enjoy them because I feel like they aren't a real person. A lot of Christian authors write as if they know all the answers and give you a list of things to do so you can know God like they do. And for me, I might remember one or two things but rarely nothing. The reason why I adore Donald Miller is because is perfectly and honestly real. He is real with his emotions, his relationship with God, his doubts, his life, and everything in between. I read his novels and actually think that I could be his friend because he gets it. I think the best way to put it is that he is not intimidating and makes God seem close and not a list away. 


In this novel, Miller talks about the Christian religion and God. He writes so beautifully about what he has discovered about faith. I am only half way through right now but here are a quote or two of things that really stuck to me and make perfect sense. 


"The very scary thing about religion, to me, is that people actually believe God is who they think He is. By that I mean they have Him all figured out, mapped out, and as my pastor, Rick, says, 'dissected and put into jars on a shelf.'"


I love that because it holds so much truth to it. I think a lot of Christians, including me, walk around thinking that we know God so perfectly. We think that we get Him. Yes, we can understand that He is loving, compassionate, redeemer, and such and such. But He is so much bigger than that. And I completely agree with this statement because I have seen it first hand. 


I went to a Christian school for just a semester of college and thank goodness it was only that long. Before I went to the school, I was so excited and could not wait to be surrounded by loving people who were open and non-judgemental. I was excited to have roommates that wanted to walk by me through struggles and have grace over my mistakes. I dreamed of learning about God everyday in a community. I was beyond ecstatic.


To the say the least- those dreams and wishes did not come true. 


I think that there is a dangerous problem with Christians school no matter what learning grade because I have gone to a few over the years. The dangerous problem is that most people in the community think that they actually have God figured out. Many people (not all by any standards) in those situations feel empowered because they think they understand everything and are closed off to new ideas or views. 


I went to the school having big dreams and I think in the beginning, I thought I had God mapped out and I completely understood Him. But boy did He show me, through that semester, that I was wrong. 


I don't know God because I never will know Him completely. I mean come on He is God, the creator of everything, the breathe of life, never beginning and never ending, all powerful, all mighty, and the list could go on. So how could I know Him? How could I understand everything about Him? 


My journey is about discovering Him and exploring these new ideas about Him. That's what it's about because that's when other people will actually want to know the God we serve. That's how people stopping hating religion and learn to welcome it because it doesn't seem like a list of perfect statements followed by perfect feelings followed by perfect friends followed by perfect life. 


Today, I am finally thankful for my semester at that Christian college, which took almost a year to be thankful for. I realized that I am wonderfully and fearfully made. I understood that we are not meant to be in a community judging everybody else and never ever ever ever forgiving. I discovered that Christians, including me, are far from perfect so we really need to stop acting like it. 


The best thing I finally understood was why people don't want to join the Christian religion. 


I get it. I understand it. I can completely relate why people are turned off. 


I finally understood that it's us that turn people away from Christ because we think we actually completely understand God. 




"I am only saying I think I know who He is, then I figure out I don't know very much at all. For instance, and as I have said, a lot of people believe God responds to formulas, but He doesn't. So that is one example of how our idea of God is always becoming a bit more accurate. And that's one of the things you notice about Jesus in the Gospels, the He is always around saying, You have heard it said such and such, but I tell you some other thing. If you happened to be a person who thought they knew everything about God, Jesus would have been completely annoying." 


Brilliant. 





Side Note- I do not hate Christian schools or churches. I believe there are many positives to them but I was the girl to see many negatives. These negatives have made my stronger in my faith so I am grateful. However, I hope one day I can go back and enjoy a Christian gathering but today is just not that day. And I am okay with that.